Shivani’s Photo Shyness

I met Shivani during the first days of my volunteership program in Himachal. The way Shivani walked into the cafe with a friend made it evident that she’s a special one for the people at Firgun. She came to me asking if I'm the new volunteer, then sat down in the kitchen beside me & started talking about how she see Firgun as her home away from home. She was telling me a story within these stories, of how this place and the people she met here turned out to be the way it is now for her. About how she found belongingness & comfort in people who were there with her when she was crying and working sitting in Firgun because her boss was eating her head up. She was telling me how special I'm most likely going to feel about the place really soon. I didn't talk much. I couldn't have enough of how her eyes kept on shining while she was talking about how she felt.

The next day when Shivani walked in to the cafe was when my eyes were in decent competition with the color of an apple after a remarkable crying session. I was thanking myself for ditching my lens & using glasses for a while because it cover up pretty much everything when they got different coatings on the themselves, so that it helps most people to mind their business easily. It didn't work with Shivani, because she looks people in eyes & wear glasses too! She came with the menu asking "Heyyy, you cried?" What happened? Acha, later!"

We didn't talk then, but I remember the look she had for the smile I gave her & for her friend the next afternoon. That day when I sat down with her & her friend for sometime, I figured that Shivani is camera-shy.

I want you to see the person I see when I look at you. You will never see yourself with the love others have for you. And that's what makes someone beautiful, not angles & contours. You'll be never be biased about your appearances. But fortunately for you, your friends and family are. They're biased to see you through the way they smile when you walk into a room. They want every photo of yours because each of it is tied to your memory.

You are the worst judge of how you should smile when you see a camera. You look fine. The camera loves you. Now take a picture. ❤️